|About the Book|
Maggie is a newly single, junk-food-binging shoplifter looking to change her life and her self-hating ways. Paul is her passionately convicted, formerly four-hundred-pound compulsive-overeating sponsor in a twelve-step program for recovering thieves. Maggies jealous ex-boyfriend is a charismatic wannabe Puerto Rican small-time thief of uncertain ancestry named Flaco who spins a grammatically challenged but persuasive yarn about seven hundred and fifty thousand dollars in unprotected drug money sitting in a safe in a downtown disco guarded by an easily distracted crackhead. This dubious and ragtag would-be criminal crew is rounded out by Flacos new girlfriend, the fabulous Boochiea malaprop-slinging topless dancer who refuses to let her troubled childhood or her third-grade reading level stand in the way of her inevitable path to fame, fortune and fur. When things dont quite go according to plan, this bickering quartet of hapless thieves finds themselves at the mercy of Louie The Little Tuna Pescatore, a reluctant, donut-ingesting heir to the criminal empire run by his fatherThe Big Tunawho has left him in charge for the weekend. The penalty for stealing from the Tuna is deathBa Da Bing, Ba Da Boom. But Louie offers them a break: I need one body and three thumbs, you can choose the who, whys and wherefores among yourselves. Tied to chairs and able to move only their mouths, they must now fight for their lives by out-arguing each other as to who deserves to live. Verbal gymnastics and the struggle for self-awareness, self-acceptance and self-love produce a high-octane battle for survival thats not resolved until the last donut falls.